It’s November, so it’s officially time to start panicking about the holidays. If you’re anything like me, you have a list a mile long of stuff you want to get your loved ones, and are agonizing over how to trim it down so you don’t put yourself into massive debt and end up living in a refrigerator box. Also if you’re like me, you may used to people not getting you quite what you wanted. Well, today is your lucky day.
My husband, before every holiday or special occasion, without fail, asks me what I want. I used to get annoyed by this because it ruined the surprise and didn’t require any actual thought on his part [after all, how can something be special and romantic if I have to tell him to do it?], but after a few disappointing occasions with no gifts, and a few with awful gifts, I finally gave in. And you know what? I like my presents much better now. Because I picked them out [don’t get me started on how this contributes to putting the mental burden on women. It does. I know. But I want good presents.].
So I know that what a blog like As A Mother is supposed to do now is step in and save the day by giving you the most perfectly curated gift guide for everyone in your family, but if you’ve learned anything about me by now, hopefully it is that I am a constant disappointment far too difficult a human being for that. Also, I hope you’ve learned that yeah, we talk about our partners and our kids here, but AAM is really about you. So for once, we’re going to put moms first. Before you worry about creating that holiday list for everyone on your family tree, here’s a wish list for you. Treat yo’ self, mamas. Send this list to your family and actually enjoy unwrapping those presents this year.
[Also, personal note to my family: this is the stuff I want this year. You’re welcome.]
To make things a bit more digestible, we’ve broken our list up into three installments. We’re kicking things off with the Mom Goods, for those of you who need everybody to know you have created tiny humans in your image and you’re obsessed with them.
1. Le Papier Studio custom silhouette necklace: Send in a profile of your spawn, and they'll make a custom laser-cut silhouette in the metal of your choice. I haven't taken mine off for over a year, and I love having Theory's sweet little mug hanging around my neck every day.
2. Custom family dolls: This is a gift for you and your kids. They'll love to play with dolls that look just like all of you, but the awwww! factor will belong to you and you alone.
3. Cads About Maternity: Like Cards Against Humanity but find your real mom life is filled with more references to hemorrhoids and hormonal hair loss than Helen Keller? This game is for you.
4. Babies vs. Parents: I seriously can't help myself. I write about being a mom all day, and all these mom-centrically inappropriate card games have sucked me in.
5. KinderPerfect: Seriously, last one. Don't judge me. I JUST LIKE TO HAVE FUN.
6. World's Okayest Mom Tumbler: In other news, I like coffee, and that color looks deceptively close to As A Mother coral. But also, let's be honest, k? I am not "World's Best Mom" tumbler material. And that's okay. I'm pretty okay at being okay.
7. Custom Family Peg Dolls: My love for Teeny Weeny Toys is well-documented. Seriously, I can't get enough of the painstaking attention to detail and the sweet fit-in-the-palm-of-your-hand size. Again, your kids will love these, but you're the one they're gonna hit right in the feels.
8. Custom Watercolor Portrait: I love art, and I love that this take on the family portrait isn't your typical stuffy oil painting. Order it now, and it won't be here in time for Christmas, but just print out the stinking receipt, wrap it up, and call it a day.
9. Bonding Time Print: Speaking of loving art, have you fallen in love with Soosh's work yet? Most famous for their illustrations of a hulking dad reduced to Jell-O by his tiny daughter, every. single. one. of their prints makes me want to scoop my kid up and squeeze them until they understand the depth of my love for them [so, forever].
10. Inappropriate Candle: I can't help but giggle every time I think about this candle. You choose the scent- I don't care. I just need the word "prolapsing" prominently displayed in my home...because LOL.
There you have it, ladies [and also the gents they forwarded this post to]. Any other amazeballs #momlife gift ideas?
Stay tuned for Part Two, coming next week!